New Orleans: Day 2

After an evening I'd sooner rather forget, I have recovered from my drunken antics from the night before. I did return to the French Quarter, where I met two black girls who invited me out with them, but instead came back to my place and an almost threesome was to follow. However, it was all a ploy to rob me of my credit card while distracting me with sexual distractions. Which they failed, having stolen instead, my debit card with Visa internet purchase abilities. I called the bank and had that taken care of. So the fun continues this morning after a lengthy recovery. It is now time to head out, and explore the city in a more sober fashion.

I expected to learn a lot about myself and grow from travelling, and I did. For some time, I had always wanted some sort of sexual experience. I get it now, that it's not the sex I miss, it's just the woman I once had sex with. Without going into it too deeply… It's not about the act, as much as the person. If I am not in love… I just don't get off. It's sensationless. Boring. Empty. That's how I felt last night. Probably going to be a big re-occuring problem with my love life, but that's not what this blog is about.

After a long sleep in, I made my way to conchone butcher. A great restaurant. I met a woman named Mindi there, and we ate and walked along the riverside to the French quarter. I made my way back to the hotel, and then went to Frenchman street. I listened to real new Orleans music at maison where I drank a Saranac, and then stopped in to a restaurant for dinner. It was an unnecessary meal, but this is my last night. I wanna try crawfish. I'll be up late doing laundry. I'll be up early too to drive to Austin. I've got a lot to think about still. Like, how far do I go?

New Orleans is delightful. Filled with great food, music, seedy under belly and plenty to do, this town really is one of a kind.

Tomorrow, Austin. This trip is going as planned. But for the most part, I have to decide how my story unfolds. I don't see a clear path. What do I want at the end of the day... I'm feeling a bit lost, not a lot, but just a tiny bit. I mean… My life parallels this adventure. I have no idea where to go next, nor do I know what I should do next with my life… Do I go to Vancouver? Do I go back home? When I get back home, what do I do then? I can't work minimum wage forever. It really isn't practical. So how then, can I make the most of this experience? 

The Road to New Orleans

After a night in Nashville, I've made my way to Lynchburg. Home of Jack Daniel's. I got in around 10am, decided to take the tour, that started around 11:30, and was back on the road at 1pm. I used my free time earlier to explore Lynchburg square. Spoke with locals, learned a lot. I would say racial tensions exist on a very subtle level. However, I think it might be comparable to south African politics that way. Southern folk from what I have seen are delightfully wonderful people. Warm, talkative, animated... The accents are charming.

After the distillery, I made my way towards new Orleans. I'm still on the road, about 5 hours away.

I'm drunk on bourbon street. I had two " hand grenade's" and a jack and coke. I'm fucked. It is a lot of fun though. I haven't been this drunk in a very long time. I wish Katja were alive. She'd have enjoyed spending time with me in this context. What a great girl she was. I am super fucked. I love new Orleans!

I accept that my love life is dead. I don't want it to be, but that's reality. I'm a loser. I am. I had the perfect woman, and now she's dead. What can I do to fix that... Nothing. And that is okay. I've had a lot of fun. But to be honest... I'm so bored...

Okay. I lied. I am so drunk, I can't make rational decisions. I think this was a good experience in terms of the French quarter and bourbon street... But otherwise, I am going to wake up with a huge hangover.

I understand that my dead girlfriend will impact my life forever. I do want a new healthy relationship with a great woman. But if I can't get laid in new Orleans... Then I am screwed.

Nashville Night

After a long painful 15-16 hour journey, I finally arrived on Nashville. The weather is lovely, and it's easy to forget that it is still winter. Coats are optional.

I plan on visiting the bluebird café, but it gets busy. It's tv famous now... I'm eating dinner at a carrabbas, and it is very nice.

Tomorrow I'll drive to new Orleans or extend my stay in Nashville. I think I'll downsize my original plans. I'll visit America for a week. I think it is important not to lose the victories I have won financially. So a small winter break, and then back home to plan my future.

I'll close my small business account when I get home. I'll still have money to draw on, and can spend it wisely as I look for new work and a place to live.

Carrabbas is extremely busy. I've never seen a community flocking to restaurants in such large numbers. I haven't worked for a restaurant this busy since perhaps east side Mario's. But that was an organizational disaster.

I'd like to go out west, but I feel that it is too far away. I really should save up for my future. I shouldn't blow all my savings on an adventure.

Nomadic Thoughts

In five hours, I must wake up and prepare for my morning workout at the gym. Or, I can slack off, and go in the evening. Never worked out in the evening before… Hmmmm… Anyways. In roughly two weeks or so, I will be a nomad. Lost. Without a home of my own. All my things will be locked away in storage, or until my step mother gets bored and needs a hobby, and decides to discard my belongings saying that the storage locker is just too "piled up" and needs to be downsized. She's nuts that way. Bored, unhappy, always needing to do something to feel relevant. Am I any different? Perhaps. Perhaps not. Why do I travel? Is it to feel relevant? Or am I going on a wild adventure because I feel I may never again have the opportunity? I have to settle myself somewhere, someplace. I don't have much. In any context. I don't have much in terms of things, people that I feel close to, or anything else really.

I don't know how to make my life work. I wrote a screenplay, one that might flop. I have to prepare for the worst. I don't know how. If the agency sells the screenplay, great! If not... I can expect a hard road ahead. What do I expect to get out of this... This road trip. How is it a good investment of time and effort? What am I supposed to be doing? This screenplay is not going to work. That's not insecure thinking, it's probability, variation, and a casino game working against me. I'm on my own now. I'm homeless, lost, and unsure of what to do. What can I get out of this experience to help me move forward? I wish I knew. I wish I had more direction. I don't know a single soul in Hollywood. I don't know who to send my screenplay to. Yet, if everything stayed the same, and the house was not sold, I'd be in the same place. Working. Saving. Buying toys. This change, has me looking west. The screenplay is all I have. It's my only ticket. I guess I have to at least try. I should read up on that perhaps. Other agencies. 

The Road Ahead

I'm not sure what lies ahead for me. I don't know what to expect from this adventure west. I am afraid. Yet, I shouldn't be. I've been more reckless than this in the past. Traveling to Europe without a second thought, not really budgeting or planning things out. So what makes this trip any different? A car? Winter? Or the sheer distance?

I have managed to wake up at a reasonable time this morning, but don't quite know what to do with the time I have now. A shower is in order, but then what? Grocery shopping perhaps. Packing! Yes! I'll shower and then I will pack for the move. Then it will be lunch time, and then I can get groceries.

So it's noon now, and my plan was executed well. I packed probably half my things! It's lunch time now, and I'm not sure what to have. Eating at a restaurant is tempting. Panera, a sushi place... But I have to be disciplined with my money. I can go to Panera and have a single meal for $15, or buy 12-14 veggie burger patties that'll last about two weeks for the same price. I can go to Johnny rockets and eat a hot dog and fries for $10, or buy those ingredients and cook at home for the same price. That is actually what I will do for lunch. Done!

Okay, I bought grocery store sushi instead. Visited mom, got her food. Ran errands for work.

Work was slower than usual. It came and went. Tomorrow, I have to run more errands. Then I'll work that day and have Monday and Tuesday off. I read up on the north west and I am excited by it. I'm considering settling out west perhaps. I have no idea what the heck to do with my life. Now I have two weeks or so to figure out what to do! Ugh.

2 Weeks of Work

In 2 weeks, it will be roughly February 10th. My last day of work. 5 days later, I'll be well on my way west. Each morning leading up to my departure, I need to pack something. That will make the process easier.

I don't know how I feel about this trip. But, I have to do it. I don't think I can avoid it. If I don't go, I'll regret it. On the bright side, the agents in Toronto have put the screenplay on their reading list. So that means they're actually giving it a chance! That is worth being excited for.

I wonder how this trip will turn out. What I'll get out of it. If it'll make me a better person or something like that. It'll be a great story to tell. Good thing I'll be blogging all about it! Winter will be a challenge, but nothing I can't overcome.

Time for bed. I'll make the most of every moment, and I'll be ready for the trip. 

The Road Less Traveled

Last night I was sent home from work early, and found myself in bed wondering what I should have for dinner, or what I should do with the free time given to me. I ended up falling asleep with the lights on, only to turn them off around 6am. I regret not coming up with a plan, but I also saved money by not going out to buy a meal. My tip share was $150 higher than predicted, so that is good news. What isn't good is the slow traffic, and being sent home early. I have less than three weeks now, soon in the blink of an eye it will be two weeks, then it will be go time!

I still don't know what path I'll take. Will I go south to the gulf? Or directly west over the Rockies... What do I hope to get out of this experience?