Nomadic Thoughts

In five hours, I must wake up and prepare for my morning workout at the gym. Or, I can slack off, and go in the evening. Never worked out in the evening before… Hmmmm… Anyways. In roughly two weeks or so, I will be a nomad. Lost. Without a home of my own. All my things will be locked away in storage, or until my step mother gets bored and needs a hobby, and decides to discard my belongings saying that the storage locker is just too "piled up" and needs to be downsized. She's nuts that way. Bored, unhappy, always needing to do something to feel relevant. Am I any different? Perhaps. Perhaps not. Why do I travel? Is it to feel relevant? Or am I going on a wild adventure because I feel I may never again have the opportunity? I have to settle myself somewhere, someplace. I don't have much. In any context. I don't have much in terms of things, people that I feel close to, or anything else really.

I don't know how to make my life work. I wrote a screenplay, one that might flop. I have to prepare for the worst. I don't know how. If the agency sells the screenplay, great! If not... I can expect a hard road ahead. What do I expect to get out of this... This road trip. How is it a good investment of time and effort? What am I supposed to be doing? This screenplay is not going to work. That's not insecure thinking, it's probability, variation, and a casino game working against me. I'm on my own now. I'm homeless, lost, and unsure of what to do. What can I get out of this experience to help me move forward? I wish I knew. I wish I had more direction. I don't know a single soul in Hollywood. I don't know who to send my screenplay to. Yet, if everything stayed the same, and the house was not sold, I'd be in the same place. Working. Saving. Buying toys. This change, has me looking west. The screenplay is all I have. It's my only ticket. I guess I have to at least try. I should read up on that perhaps. Other agencies. 

The Road Ahead

I'm not sure what lies ahead for me. I don't know what to expect from this adventure west. I am afraid. Yet, I shouldn't be. I've been more reckless than this in the past. Traveling to Europe without a second thought, not really budgeting or planning things out. So what makes this trip any different? A car? Winter? Or the sheer distance?

I have managed to wake up at a reasonable time this morning, but don't quite know what to do with the time I have now. A shower is in order, but then what? Grocery shopping perhaps. Packing! Yes! I'll shower and then I will pack for the move. Then it will be lunch time, and then I can get groceries.

So it's noon now, and my plan was executed well. I packed probably half my things! It's lunch time now, and I'm not sure what to have. Eating at a restaurant is tempting. Panera, a sushi place... But I have to be disciplined with my money. I can go to Panera and have a single meal for $15, or buy 12-14 veggie burger patties that'll last about two weeks for the same price. I can go to Johnny rockets and eat a hot dog and fries for $10, or buy those ingredients and cook at home for the same price. That is actually what I will do for lunch. Done!

Okay, I bought grocery store sushi instead. Visited mom, got her food. Ran errands for work.

Work was slower than usual. It came and went. Tomorrow, I have to run more errands. Then I'll work that day and have Monday and Tuesday off. I read up on the north west and I am excited by it. I'm considering settling out west perhaps. I have no idea what the heck to do with my life. Now I have two weeks or so to figure out what to do! Ugh.

2 Weeks of Work

In 2 weeks, it will be roughly February 10th. My last day of work. 5 days later, I'll be well on my way west. Each morning leading up to my departure, I need to pack something. That will make the process easier.

I don't know how I feel about this trip. But, I have to do it. I don't think I can avoid it. If I don't go, I'll regret it. On the bright side, the agents in Toronto have put the screenplay on their reading list. So that means they're actually giving it a chance! That is worth being excited for.

I wonder how this trip will turn out. What I'll get out of it. If it'll make me a better person or something like that. It'll be a great story to tell. Good thing I'll be blogging all about it! Winter will be a challenge, but nothing I can't overcome.

Time for bed. I'll make the most of every moment, and I'll be ready for the trip. 

The Road Less Traveled

Last night I was sent home from work early, and found myself in bed wondering what I should have for dinner, or what I should do with the free time given to me. I ended up falling asleep with the lights on, only to turn them off around 6am. I regret not coming up with a plan, but I also saved money by not going out to buy a meal. My tip share was $150 higher than predicted, so that is good news. What isn't good is the slow traffic, and being sent home early. I have less than three weeks now, soon in the blink of an eye it will be two weeks, then it will be go time!

I still don't know what path I'll take. Will I go south to the gulf? Or directly west over the Rockies... What do I hope to get out of this experience?

Preparing for the Trip

It's the 23rd of January. On the 14th of February, I'll start my adventure west to Los Angeles. As of right now, I don't really know what I am doing. I live with my parents after failing to settle in the city of Kitchener. I had a candy business that didn't work out because I got into a car accident. It probably wouldn't have worked out anyways. So I looked for work, saved, and now the house has been sold. My goal had been to pay off my debts, and now that it's done, I've got money to chase my dreams.

However, the choices I make now, will have a profound impact on my life. What am I really doing... What direction do I want my life to head towards. I'm glad that I have choices now... Instead of being stuck or lost. Now that I have freedom, I don't really know where to go. Is this a vacation, or something that can help me move forward?

I really hope to hear back from the literary agency soon. That would make me feel better. Knowing that what I made is good, and who I should talk to in Los Angeles. I need more direction. This is a silly pursuit. Yet, if I don't go, I'll have that regret on my mind forever. So I kinda have to go west. I don't know if it is right or wrong, I just know I can't stay here. I don't belong anywhere, and now it is time to find my place in the world. I will be a nomad soon. A nomad in search of a home.